I am starting to wonder if it is my own sense of “not good enough” that has taken my joy of photography away. My own critical eye sees only the imperfections when i go to share a picture i have taken with someone else. I am afraid all of the “things i have done wrong” in lighting technique composition and post processing will be immediately obvious to everone else.
I have to admit I have trouble sharing my enjoyment of my photos with others. Maybe it is the uncertainty of what i really like about it.
Long story short i am posting a picture i took of my daughter. I like it for almost all of the reasons i don’t like it, but i do like. I really like it and i need to be ok with enjoying it rather than dumping on all the parts that i “should” have changed.
My biggest critic is myself. My greatest triumph os to continue to create even where i might have failed. To discover how many more ways there are to tell a story in photography.
Call it seasonal affective disorder. Call it depression. Call it laziness or priorities or apathy or a change of scenery. Call it what you will but I spent the last month without picking up my camera. I didn’t post process much either. Mostly I have avoided photography because for a while I lost sight of the enjoyment of it. Comparing myself to others and getting frustrated with images not turning out made me competely forget why I take pictures. So I put my camera down.
After a month I think I can finally say I want to take pictures again. I remember why I enjoy it and what I love about it. That doesn’t mean im not discouraged by my past blundera but that I still want to learn, I want to explore and I dont mind making mistakes as long as some of those are pictures I will remember and cherish and be proud of for the rest of my life. Not every actuation of the shutter will change the world but it will help me to see. And sometimes I know now I just need to put the camera down and connect with the world around me.
I wish I had some triumphal image to share with you all or some amazing announcement about becoming a pro photographer but truthfully im just happy to be back. Meandering my way through this garden of life taking a few pictures to remind me how much I have to be in awe of.
Thanks for joinig me on this journey. I promise more photos soon!